Our Trip To Anna Maria Island

Before the girls came home, one of the things I dreamed of doing was taking them to the beach for the very first time. There were so many "firsts" that we missed. I'm somewhat okay with that fact, because I know many of those "firsts" (especially with Khushboo and Kashila) were experienced with their birth family – first smiles, first words, first steps, first haircuts – I'm okay that their birth family were able to share in those joys. However, I looked forward to the "firsts" that would be ours to share, and watching them put their toes in the sand and experience the grandeur of the ocean for the first time was somewhere at the top of the list.

At the beginning of the year, we began planning to go to the beach around Lance and Asher's birthday (April). Additionally, I had discovered, through a friend, LegoLand in Florida gives pretty major discounts to home school families on certain days every month. When you have five kids, you will take any discount you can get. Can I get an amen from all my big-family-mamas? Lance and I really wanted to take advantage of this discount and take the kids to LegoLand for a day as a surprise, but I was having a hard time figuring out how to juggle a week at our usual beach spot, Panama City, and a day in Orlando. It seemed like a long drive for just one day (6 hours from Panama City).

Then it dawned on me... there are OTHER beaches in Florida! Imagine that! I started looking into beaches near central Florida and discovered a beautiful little island called Anna Maria which is just outside of Tampa and St. Petersburg. It looked like the perfect spot! While it would be a long drive down – about 8 or 9 hours with bathroom and food breaks – it was only a 2 hour drive to LegoLand, so that made a day trip there much more reasonable.

I found the perfect house for us to stay. It was huge! Three bedrooms, three bathrooms, large kitchen and dinning area AND the best part was it had it's own private pool! It was about a block from the beach which wasn't too bad. I wished we could have been right on the beach, but those type houses were quite hard to find in Anna Maria when you have a budget like ours. We booked the house for a full week and got our discounted tickets for LegoLand (an almost $400 savings)! The kids were so excited, even though they didn't know about LegoLand, and Lance and I were quite ready for a break from our daily grind.

Here's some pictures of the house... 

Front of the house. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

The private pool. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

The kitchen. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

The kitchen and living room. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

The dinning room and kitchen. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

The master bedroom. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

The master bedroom. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

The master bathroom. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

The second upstairs bedroom. Picture by Anna Maria Accommodations.

We had planned to leave for the beach around 3:00am on Lance and Asher's birthday so the kids could sleep for a while in the car but we ended up getting away around 8ish instead because Lance and I were so tired from the day before. Somehow, I fit everything in the van and still had room to shove the kids in their seats. I should have received a metal for that feat. Seriously. Ten minutes down the road, Kashila asked if we were close to the beach. [Face-palm] It was going to be a looooooooooong drive.

Just before Albany, GA, we started having issues with the van. We had O'Riley's Auto Parts read the computer and discovered we had a bad spark plug! Thankfully we were able to get a new one and Lance replaced but it cost us some time. We were so glad we had not left in the early morning else we would have just been sitting around waiting for somewhere to open! We had hoped to be in Anna Maria in the afternoon but we didn't get there until 6ish! Overall the kids did GREAT on the road. I don't recall any meltdowns. Not even from the kids. :)

We loved Anna Maria Island! There's the Gulf of Mexico on one side and the Tampa Bay on the other side. The Island is very relaxed and simple. It's almost like old school Florida. The beach isn't lined with huge condominiums and I loved that! The Island has some small condo units but mostly there's just a bunch of houses. Our house was a block from Manatee Beach, which is the most popular public beach on the island. It has a cafe, a gift shop, a lifeguard, a playground and live music at night. The downside to this beach is it got very crowded by lunchtime. I'm not a huge fan of crowds, but with the kids, we aren't able to stay at the beach much longer than a few hours so it wasn't a huge deal.

The beach was a little different than what we are used to. The sand here wasn't soft and silky like the sand on the panhandle beaches. It's a lot coarser and mostly made up of broken bits of shells. This doesn't feel so good on your feet when you're walking up the beach. However, there were a lot of little shells to pick up and Khushboo and I really enjoyed our search for little purple ones.

All the kids loved the water. It was clear and warm. No jellyfish! We would go out with several inner tubes and enjoy the waves with all the kids. I was really impressed with how brave they all were! They also enjoyed playing in the sand. Kashila kept wanting to build a sandcastle but the sand just wasn't a good consistency for building nice sandcastles.

First day at the beach!

Brayden braving the waves!

This is how we roll... er, float.

Rabina wasn't too happy with the waves at this point.

Diggin!

They tried!

Brayden taking a break.

Busy bee.

Help me mom!

Ok, I'm helping.

The sunsets here are just gorgeous! We really liked going to the beach after dinner and taking in it's beauty as the sun went down. 

 

On Monday, we woke up and drove to LegoLand! We had told the kids we had a surprise for them but had not told them what it was until that morning. The boys were beside themselves! The girls were excited too but they didn't really have the big picture.

LegoLand was great! Everyone loved it but I'm glad we had gotten discount tickets else I would have felt ripped off! It rained for a couple of hours which hindered our fun slightly but overall we had a blast! We will definitely go back in the future. 

 

During our week long stay, we explored the island and the neighboring island of Longboat Key. We found a local doughnut shop in Anna Maria that makes custom doughnuts. Lance tried the maple and bacon one. Ewww! I tried the caramel and sea salt. It was nice but pretty heavy. We also ate ice cream at a local shop. All of our cones were made and some had already been licked by the time Lance and I tried to pay with our bank card and the staff informed us they only accepted cash! Ack! No "cash only" signs that we could see so how were we to know? Lance had to run to the ATM to get some cash. Note to self: bring more cash next time!

 

We also experienced some of the local gift shops which was fun. I had allowed the children a $40 limit. They could get anything up to $40. Helping children pick souvenirs and toys is like pulling teeth for me. I picked up a nice little Anna Maria coffee mug that I use all the time now. Khushboo and I got t-shirts. Brayden got a knife. Kashila and Asher got stuffed animals and various toys. Rabina got a mermaid doll.

For the most part, we ate at the house to save money, but Lance and I had wanted to go to a nice seafood restaurant on our last night on the island. We looked at all the reviews and chose the Waterfront Restaurant. It was $$$$$!!! The food was ok but not worth the $$$$$, so we will not be returning to the Waterfront on our next visit to Anna Maria. Next time we will go across the street to the restaurant at the end of the pier. We had walked up the pier while waiting for our table and spoke to some people leaving the restaurant. They said it was really good food and good prices. Oh and it's actually on the water!

The pier and the restaurant at the end.

While we were on the pier, we had the surprise of seeing a couple of manatees in the bay right off the pier. They just say there and smiled for the cameras. Well, they just sat there. None of us have ever seen manatees before, so Lance and I were quite impressed. The kids didn't care so much. 

The manatees

  I'm sure it sounds like we didn't do a ton of exciting stuff at the beach. That's probably because we didn't do a ton of exciting stuff, but that is just what we needed. I loved being able to spend the whole week as a family with nothing to do other than enjoy our time together. It was great! Lance and I both agreed that it was probably the best beach vacation we had ever had. We look forward to visiting Anna Maria Island again in the coming years.

Until next time! -K

When Your Biggest Problem Is Yourself

The first weekend in March, I was able to get away for a conference/retreat for adoptive and foster mommas. It's called Created For Care and is all the rage in the adoption community. I had signed up for it back in August, because you have to register within the first 10 minutes that they open registration or you won't get in. I wasn't even sure I would be able to go since we didn't know when we would be traveling to get our girls and we certainly didn't know how things would be once they were home. I signed up just in case.

My roommates Rachel and Natasha! Love these girls!

Natasha and I took a wreath making session.

All the India Moms!

Anyways, obviously I made it, and it was wonderful. It wasn't one of those conferences where you walk away glassy-eyed and mouth open, because your brain just took an entire college course in a single day. No, it was pretty easy going with things like karaoke and craft making mixed in. There were some sessions that were heavier than others, but honestly, I got just what I needed... a break. I had almost two whole days free of anyone calling my name, hitting their brother, pooping in their pants, etc. It gave me a lot of time to step back and assess the last few months of our new life.

While I had time to clear my mind and recharge my batteries, I came to grips with what I had already slowly started to realize over the last couple of months... my biggest issues with our adoption transition are my own personal issues. My selfishness. My insecurity. My need for control. My lack of self-control. Me... it's me.

All my expectations of how life would be hard and overwhelming once our girls came home had mainly revolved around our kids issues (whatever those might be). I thought THEY would be the hard part. While they do have their own issues (all five of them), that's not really the hard part. I am the hard part. I am my own problem.

Never in all my life have I related so much to Paul's words in Romans 7. He says,

"For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate... For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing."

That's me! I know in my head all the things I should and shouldn't do, but yet I continue to do all the wrong things and not do the right things. I've never been as well acquainted with my own sin and weaknesses and shortcomings as I am now. 

Sometimes, I lay in bed at night completely discouraged by myself as I replay all of my mistakes from the day, and I just want to run away... from me. I lay there, gritting my teeth, swearing to myself that tomorrow will be different. I will be different tomorrow. And at the end of that tomorrow I'm laying in the same bed once again completely discouraged by myself. 

I often wonder why God chose me to be the mother of these kids (even the ones I birthed) because so often I feel like they deserve better than me. Somebody who has it all together. Somebody who doesn't lose their temper. Somebody who can spend all day playing with their kids and still keep the house tidy. Somebody who naturally smiles and laughs all the time. Somebody who can really loosen up and be fun and carefree. Somebody who is more disciplined and organized. Somebody better. 

But I can't forget my own theology that God doesn't make mistakes. He doesn't say "Whoops!" His plan is perfect, and for those who love Him it is ultimately for their good and His glory. I know that our family is divinely designed, and that design, for whatever reason, includes this broken and sinful mom full of weaknesses and shortcomings. I may never know why He chose this life for me or me for this life, but I know I can trust Him. I have to trust Him.

I wish I could say that I have found the perfect formula to help me overcome my problem of "me" – some special scripture to write on the mirror, some secret schedule to help me start my day off right, some awesome book that spells everything out – but I can't because I haven't. The only thing that I have found to cling to is this...

So I say "My endurance has perished; 

so has my hope from the Lord."

Remember my affliction and my wanderings, 

the wormwood and the gal! 

My soul continually remembers it 

and is bowed down within me. 

But this I call to mind

and therefore I have hope: 

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; 

his mercies never come to an end; 

they are new every morning; 

great is your faithfulness. 

"The Lord is my portion," says my soul, 

"therefore I will hope in him."

Lamentations 3:18-24

His mercies are new every morning. He is my portion. I just need more and more of him until there's less and less of me. <--HOPE

Until next time. -K

A SLAM PACKED Three Months Home!

February 10th was our 3 month-iversary of our “Gotcha Day”! It seems like it was forever ago, but we’ve only been with our girls for about 90 days! Weird! I'm still kind of in shock that they are actually here... officially part of our family! 

Left pic is in India

Left pic is in India

Left pic is in India

Fun with Taylor and Brayden-ette

Nap time routine

All three girls in my wedding dress! They loved it!

I gotta say this has been a SLAM PACKED three months! I mean you may just break out in a sweat by the time you get done reading all that has gone on since we got home in November!

I’m going to skip the obvious Thanksgiving and Christmas stuff. If you’re disappointed by that, go ahead and take a few minutes to imagine lots of food, lots of gifts and the addition of three little Indians or go read my Reflections post. :)

Candle Light Service on Christmas Eve

Our traditional Christmas dinner at a Chinese restaurant

Rabina and Aunt Raleigh

Walking at Meeks Park in Blairsville

Basically, as soon as we got home, we started “getting things in order.” This is kind of the sucky part of adoption. After you’ve gone through years of paperwork and jumping through all sorts of hoops, you get to do even MORE of it when your adoption is complete. The good news and the bad news is that you get to do it with a clingy toddler in your lap! I guess they want to be sure you don’t feel under-challenged when you get home.

The first thing we did was start working on new health insurance for our whole family, but most importantly for the children. For the last couple of years, we had a type of co-op coverage that was great for people like us who never go to the doctor. Unfortunately, it covers only emergency type stuff so all your doctor visits have to be paid for out of pocket. Knowing our girls dental bills alone would be tens of thousands of dollars, we decided we needed to get something that covered what we needed. Thank the Lord we found our perfect match! Everything we needed done would be covered and it would save us so much money!

However, the insurance company would NOT add the girls to the application because right now their legal names are basically their first names plus “FNU”. This stands for “Family Name Unknown” or “First Name Unknown”. I guess they didn't want them to be cool like Madonna and just have one name. Side note, it’s kind of hysterical when doctors offices and such try to pronounce FNU as a real last name... “Fuhnoo? Fnoo?” LOL! Anyways, the insurance company was saying we would have to wait until we changed their names before they would cover them. I called BS on that and bugged the snot out these people until finally I got SOMEBODY who understood that they could just change their names later. One thing I’ve learned through adoption is that nobody will fight for your child like you! Sometimes, in the best interest of your child, you have to be persistent beyond what seems reasonable.

Once we got the application for the kids started, we had to wait several weeks for things to be approved. This was really frustrating, because, in the meantime, Khusboo’s teeth began causing her a lot of pain. In December we took her to see a new dentist, Dr. Keller, because she was in so much pain. He took x-rays, looked around and determined that she had a couple of pretty major abscesses. We decided as soon as we got our insurance squared away we would need to put her under general anesthesia to take care of everything at once. She was so nervous in the chair so this was the best option. Seeing Khushboo go through so much pain during these weeks was so very hard. Regular tylenol and motrin wouldn’t touch the pain. I thought I would kill her kidneys because of how much and how often I had to give her meds. She was constantly saying, “Mom, teeth pain!” I really felt like she began getting upset with us for not taking away the pain. I tried so hard to explain why we had to wait and promised that we would get her teeth fixed but it seemed so far away!

On top of the insurance stuff, we began our re-adoption process. Yes, RE-adoption. I know, I know, you thinking, “Are you freaking serious?” My feelings exactly! Basically, while our adoption was final and we are legally their parents, we needed to go through local courts so we could change names and get U.S. birth certificates. This will make life easier for everyone! The downside to re-adopting is that is cost another $2,000 to do. We began this process mid December and are still waiting for it to be completed in the courts.

In January we got to celebrate Khushboo and Kashila’s birthdays for the very first time WITH them! We had planned to do one small birthday party for both of them, but after they told us that the orphanage would celebrate Kashila’s birthday but not Khushboo’s we felt like we really needed to celebrate each girl separately. We told them we would take them for a special birthday dinner wherever they wanted to go. Kashila wanted rice and soup so we picked Chef Lee’s and Khushboo wanted pancakes so we went to IHOP! It was so amazing to finally be with them for their birthdays. They loved the attention! 

Also in January we began homeschooling again. This has certainly been challenging with a three year old and Asher! I’m not sure which is more challenging. It’s been hard trying to figure out what the girls know and what they don’t. They seem delayed in some areas and advanced in other areas. They are usually eager to study, but I think we need to create a more rigid schedule for them. We have been considering putting the older four into public school for the rest of the year just so I can have a bit of a break, but I just haven’t had a peace about that. I really love home schooling when things go smoothly. I think we just need to find our groove.

We had the girls dedicated at church in January. What a special day that was to stand before the body of believers who have prayed for us and supported us and who were now covenanting with us to help us shepherd our new daughters hearts as they grow into young women who we pray will learn to fear and love the Lord at a very early age. It would have been completely perfect had Rabina not been trying to reach down my shirt and meow like a cat in front of the entire church. Yes, toddlers are so fun. Sadly I have no pictures of this yet.

We went to the social security office to try to get social security numbers for the girls so we can file our taxes. If you’ve ever been to the SS office or any other government facility then that sentence is all you need to read to know how that day went.

Mid January, we got all of our insurance squared away! We went back to the dentist for Kashila and Rabina. While Kashila hasn’t been in pain like Khushboo, her teeth were still pretty bad so we decided to put her under general anesthesia as well to get it all done at once. We scheduled their procedures for February 6th. Rabina’s teeth were perfect! Praise the Lord!

Since we finally had medical coverage, we also scheduled doctors visits for the girls. They had their eyes checked, their ears checked, and all the regular stuff. After discussing their health history, the doctor ordered battery of blood work, lead screenings, TB tests, and stool samples. 

We got the tests and blood work completed a couple of weeks ago. This was an excruciatingly long day. We were told the girls couldn’t eat before their appointment and Rabina was NOT happy about that at all. Cramming a mom and five bored kids into a tiny exam room is a recipe for disaster. I don’t want to do that again for a really long time! The girls did really well with all the sticks! They were so brave! We left tired, grumpy, and hungry with stool sample kits in hand. Hey, at least we had something to look forward to. 

Asher took this during our super long doctors visit

The same day we went to the doctor, the Monday night before the girl’s dental procedures, Khushboo took a turn for the worst with her teeth pain. She came in our room late that night crying about how bad she was hurting. They had given her some stronger pain meds but it wasn’t touching the pain at all. She began running a fever the following day and her face swelled up horribly. She stayed in bed all day that day. Thankfully we were able to get her in to see the dentist and he gave her a hardcore antibiotic and a much stronger pain med. We thought we might have to take her to the ER that night because she was complaining about her throat hurting and not being able to breathe well. We thought the swelling might be spreading down her throat. We waited a bit and finally she went back to sleep. The meds really helped! The fever was gone and swelling went down.

Khushboo's swollen face

On Wednesday, we had to take the girls back to doctor to get their TB test spots read. This should have been a very quick and easy ordeal, but both Khushboo and Kashila had positive test readings. I was super depressed about this because I felt like the medical stuff would never end! They told us we would need to go to the hospital for more blood work for the Ks and chest x-rays for all three girls!

Also on Wednesday, we had dental cleanings for Brayden and Asher to get them established with our new dentist (LOVE Dr Keller btw). Yes, I’m a glutton for punishment. We almost didn’t make it to the appointment because the fuss that was made over the TB reads. Thankfully my mom came to help me watch the girls in the waiting room while I went back with the boys.

Last Friday was TEETH DAY! After weeks and weeks of waiting, we were getting those chompers FIXED! The girls were just so amazing! They skipped into the hospital and didn’t act nervous at all. The procedures went really well. Both girls had multiple extractions. Khushboo needed a bit more extensive work and she woke up in a good amount of pain. By the time Khushboo had come into recovery, Kashila was already sitting in Lance’s lap playing on the ipad as if nothing had ever happened. We went home around 3:00 in the afternoon. Poor Khushboo was pitiful. She threw up several times from the anesthesia. I had to give her some anti-nausea meds to help her. 

 

By Saturday the girls were feeling much better! Khushboo was saying her pain level was lower than it was before the procedure! Those were awesome words to hear! By Sunday they were just about normal! We are all so thankful that our dental woes are behind us! Khushboo is like a totally different child! She talks and smiles much more now! I'm loving seeing her blossom now that she is pain free.

This Tuesday, we went to the hospital for the girls additional TB tests. Our precious friend Allison kept the boys all morning for us! Once again the girls were total champs with the blood work and x-rays! No tears at all! Rabina had to be held in place for her x-rays and the moment she was released ran into some office up the hall while I was checking on the Ks. She is a fast little booger! The staff was great and gave them big teddy bears and snacks! We still haven't gotten the results from any of this. I'm kind of assuming, since TB is pretty serious, no news is good news.

Are you sweating yet? HAHA! I'll stop here so you can go rest. :)

Speaking of rest, I will be getting a 3 day break the first weekend in March because I will be going to Created 4 Care. It's an adoption/foster care conference for moms! This will be my first time, but I've heard so many people rave about it! I'll be rooming with a couple of fellow India moms. I think we are all really looking forward to the time away to refresh. I'll probably post a blog about it once I get home. 

Until next time! -K